American Investing

I consider myself a pretty dollar savy fellow. I am always seeking new avenues and opportunities to invest small amounts of money into. The problem is that I often desire to cash in my long term investment accounts. I see that it’s worth a few bucks and the consumer switch (I imagine one like an electric chair) slams down with the weight of being a hamburger loving American all of my life. I have yet to cash in on one of my accounts but I’ve come close.

You know things are tough when you start eyeing your 401k like a starved wolf in a chicken coop thinking to yourself “Just X more years and I can have the money…”. Whoever thought of 401k was a genius. He probably worked for the Federal Reserve and was tasked with how to screw the working man out of yet another small portion of his accumulated wealth. He was locked in a room for days until he came up with 401k. It was most ironic because the plan was for life to kill your ass before you could cash it. Pure genius…

On a side note if you get married and die
prematurely your widow/s (yes, ex-wives
have rights to what 401k was invested
while you were married.) get to cash
in on it. So I guess it isn't THAT evil.

Global Warming

Global Warming is a bad thing. With that being said I feel confident that I've informed my readers of the facts. Seriously though, who recycles? I don't know a single person that consistently recycles their trash. I think there are only 2 ways that we're realistically going to save our planet. The first and definitely least popular is with tough new laws put in place by top governments forcing their people and industries to recycle. The other and more favorable but less likely way is for new laws to pass that reward us for recycling.

On the first concept I could see the government adding heavy taxes to public trash disposal and adding non-optional recycle bins to dump locations. Also, there would be civil fines for not separating your trash properly. The later concept would be that you keep up with your glass, plastic and paper pounds per month (via the dumpsite) and are reimbursed via tax breaks. That really doesn't sound like a bad idea. Even if the re-imbursement was miniscule it would still be enough incentive to get me to do it. It goes without mentioning that the homeless would probably have our streets picked clean overnight. Just imagine, “Sir, can you spare some glass?” Why yes, yes I can. They’re practically begging you to throw empty beer bottles at them. Nobody loses, everybody wins.